Friday, August 09, 2024

My favorite memory

Hey little one,

It's almost 4 pm in Niagara Falls, and I'm still working. My work went well. The stock market is quite good even though many investors are still cautious about it. They are worried the market will crash again. Let's hope the market continues to do well. My work was fruitful today, and I am so happy. Finally, hard work has paid off. Alhamdulillah.

New York nowadays is not like a decade ago. You can smell urine along the street along with the sour and foul smell of vomit. The roads are not paved properly. It's kind of like the roads in some parts of Malaysia. Come to Costa Rica. Costa Rica is among the cleanest countries. It is home to thousands of orchid species and has cute Variegated Squirrels.

Please say hi to your mommy. She sent me an email, but I didn't reply. I can't reply to her. I need to stop contacting her. I don't want to cause any trouble. I love your mommy so much. I guess this is the right thing to do. She can email me anytime, but I won't reply even though I want to badly. I need to be tough. I have to for our own good.

Your mommy isn't ready to have another baby. Be patient with her, okay? Sometimes she feels sad thinking about her career. She once dreamed big. She has a lot of dreams. She shared with me all her dreams and her fears. Give her time to "accept" you. She will love you. Don't worry. If she gets in a low mood, make her smile again. You smile, and she will smile too.

I have convinced her to open her arms to you. We always receive something when we are not ready either physically or mentally, but fate has written for us. A wise man once advised me, "Allah is never wrong. Only we fail to grasp His wisdom." You are born with a purpose. You will rise high. You will be a great man in the future. I can't wait to see you grow up.

Thinking about you always makes me happy. It's like a dream come true. I need to get back to work. Tell your mommy that I miss her as much as she misses me. I used to miss her two dots. She misses me two and a half dots. She always says, "I miss you so so so much." She loves saying, "I love you." That is the most wonderful sound I will always remember.
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Sayang,

Don't say sorry. It's my fault, not yours. Have you eaten properly today? Did you feel sleepy? Take care of yourself. I didn't say goodbye, but distance is good for both of us. We will continue longing for each other like we always do. I miss you every minute my heart beats. I miss your sweet lips that always thrill me. I miss you calling me "abang sayang." I miss everything about you, my sweet love. 

The time we talk is so precious. We talk for less than an hour, and you go to take a nap for two hours or one and a half hours. I can still wait for another call even though it always makes me frustrated, but the thing about love is it doesn't expect anything in return. I am happy to accompany you. Sometimes we don't want to talk. We just sit and be silent. We enjoy that moment more than anything. 

I need you to do something for me
I need you to let me go
You have to let me let you go
In another life
Maybe it was you and me
Maybe there we loved each other right
And we were happy together
Maybe in that life we did all the things we said we would
But we got this one instead
You were my friend, my love and now a stranger
But you always be my favorite memory. 

— Unknown

 
Niagara Falls, New York, USA
August 8, 2024