I haven't told anyone that I'm still in contact with her. I also didn't pass her salam to Ocio—perhaps I'm afraid Zara will find out, as she tends to eavesdrop and might tell my wife. I don't want anyone to know, so I've kept silent. Ocio didn't ask anything about her, so I thought it was best not to say anything. I don't know if Ary has told anyone about this. I hope he can keep his mouth shut and not let the cat out of the bag. Loose lips sink ships, and I want to keep this secret from everybody until I figure a way out.

I didn't know Ocio had a visitor. If I had known, I wouldn't have come. She is the daughter of Ocio's best friend. Her name is Hana. Yes, the postgraduate girl from Imperial College, studying engineering, specifically in robotics or nanotechnology (I can't remember which). I stopped contacting her quite some time ago. Her father tried to set me up with her, but I politely declined. I had someone else in my heart and wasn't ready to get married. I am still taking my time to get over her and heal all wounds.

Then I met Ara. I like her. I always see her browsing books at Kinokuniya. I never had the courage to say hi. I just wanted to look at her—she somehow makes me feel something. At the very least, I would smile at her, and she would smile back. I didn't know how to approach her. There's a café nearby, but I lost my nerve to ask her out for a drink. I always remember Mr. A once waiting for my dear girl at the parking lot to ask her out. Each time I remember that, I feel unhappy and I take my leave.

Unfinished notes

22-02-2024 / 3:33 am