My heart feels burdened by the heaviness of your absence. The gap separating us seems impossible to overcome, and the pain in my soul intensifies with each passing second. I never expressed my strong desire to take you to Italy, although I kept it to myself during our time together. I always recall that the Trans-Siberian journey is on your bucket list, whereas mine is conquering Mount Everest. You cherished Switzerland for its breathtaking landscapes, while I adored Italy without any specific rationale. We didn't have the same preferences, but we were okay with our differences.
Do you still long for me? I cannot deny that at times I wish you felt the same longing for me as I do for you. However, the truth is that you had forgotten about me long ago. Your hatred towards me grew immensely once he entered your life. I still recall the pain caused by reading your email, but I have come to accept it. All your words, despite their harshness, hold true. You left me in pursuit of a brighter future, and I never held you accountable for that decision. Your future deserves to be fulfilling, entrusted to safe hands. *Love is when the other person's happiness is more important than your own.
I have loved you since the age of 18, and my love for you persists. It is not a simple task to stop loving someone like you. I feel envious of the man who has the privilege of hearing your gentle voice, holding your hands, and listening to your stories. He wakes up next to you each morning and embraces you each night. The best man has emerged victorious, and I accept my defeat. I cannot win you back. You are not meant to be my destiny. To be truthful, I have never regretted falling for you. As time passes, I make efforts to improve myself, but regrettably, not for you, but for someone else.
I am grateful for the immense kindness you bestowed upon me. The knowledge and wisdom you imparted to me will forever remain ingrained in my memory. Reflecting upon our connection always evokes a profound sense of sorrow, causing tears to well up in my eyes. Your presence lingers in my thoughts, and I am unable to erase you from my mind. The sheer happiness I experienced in your company remains etched in my heart, and I am endlessly grateful for the joy you brought into my life. Loving someone as extraordinary as you has illuminated my existence, and I cannot express enough gratitude for that.
PS: Have you seen Buck Moon tonight?
*H. Jackson Brown Jr
Abang sayang
Capri, Italy
Jul 3rd, 2023, 10:22 pm